Wednesday, March 31, 2010

New Main!

That's it. I have had it with healing the ungrateful, rude masses. I will no longer toss a renew to someone out of combat to help them regen faster. I will no longer worry if the greater heal that I trinketed and used all my specials on will hit the tank before he dies. I won't bother giving people fortitude and spirit buffs. Nope. I refuse to carry candles.

No, I'm not going to switch out to Carlotta. She needs too much. Damned arrows and food for the beast, not to mention bandages and potions she makes for everyone else but her.

Shawndra is out as well. Her gear costs too much to repair. And people expect her to tank. Bleah. I want none of that responsibility.

Not even Gwenna the mage. Nope. She has about 3 too many reagents to carry around, and they cost money. Not to mention that people expect her to make them food and water, and focus magic, and sometimes sheep/rabbit things. Forget that!

I am even going to forsake the Horde. Yep. Horde is too hardcore for me. I'm thinking I want the easy life of hanging out in places like Goldshire and Stormwind and Ironforge, where the only attacks I have to dodge are the X rated RP offers.

Here is my new main. Her name is Muppsey. Be afraid. Be VERY afraid. And healers? Yeah, I'm going to life tap myself down to the bone. You'll heal me and like it.

Oh, I thought I'd change it up a bit and join a real raiding guild, too. So, I'm rolling her on the US-Sentinels server, where Premagon (or is it Paranition?) is going to get ready for Cataclysm and the new raid content it contains. I'm sure once they see her shadow bolt spam they will fall in love with her and beg her to join. Even if she can't heal. Or cook. Did I mention there will be no small eggs cooked by her? Nope, no eggs at all. No cooking, no fishing, no first aid. Just tailoring and enchanting, which I will have my minions (read:children) level for me.

Muppsey is all about the selfish desire to do absolutely nothing that benefits anyone but my selfish need to only dps, and sponge off of everyone I can possibly manage to. Expect a lot of posts about how I wiped groups and pissed off healers and tanks in the next several weeks. It will be such a change from the bad groups and awful people posts I have grown accustomed to reading in my feed reader!

Oh, and Happy April First. :)

1 comment:

Angelya said...